What didn’t happen this summer…

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You know what they say about the best laid plans…. My boundless heaps of enthusiasm at the beginning of June, for the transformation that would occur over summer, are now staring me straight in the face. I’m getting the family calendar ready for September and summer is now being measured in hours and days, instead of weeks.

Here’s what DIDN’T happen on my summer vacation. I hope it resonates with some of you other suntanned summer slackers out there, too.

  1. I didn’t get my bikini body back, but I swam anyway. 
  2. My children didn’t become best friends, but there were moments that they liked each other. I have photos. 
  3. My house didn’t get organized room by room, but my junk drawer got cleaned out and has stayed that way for two weeks. 
  4. I didn’t prepare lovely meals for my family each day, but my kids kept growing even while subsisting on ratbomb chicken nuggets and buttered noodles. 
  5. My family photos are still in dusty boxes as unorganized as they were on June 1, but I printed new albums from my phone. (Yay, Chatbooks!). 

Every book didn’t get read, every house project didn’t get done, but man, did I have a great summer. If you slacked off this summer, just smile. I live pert’ near the artic circle, y’all. Nearly all of Minnesota becomes a mosquito hell at dusk. Every day spent in the sun is a reason to celebrate. I don’t feel bad about one damn thing I didn’t get done this summer. Not really. Neither should you. If your family had fun, you were able to relax, and there are pictures of the people you love most smiling in the sunshine then you did EXACTLY what you should have done this summer. Well done, friends, well done.

Keep sharing moxie. For real!

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Speak Your Truth

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Speak your truth. Even as I write this I  am mindful of the fact that speaking your truth does not always parlay into speaking “the truth”. Speaking your truth is what you hold in your heart and believe to be true. Product matters, but so does process. I’m not particularly proud to say that I have, on occasion, written and made some rather scathing remarks. Some of these things needed to be said, but I regret the way I said them (some of them, I’m no saint). On the other hand, there are times that I have not said anything and I wish that I had. Speak your truth when you’re afraid. Speak your truth when you think it doesn’t matter; it does. Stop saying you’re fine, when you’re not.

I’ve been working on this and just so you don’t think I’m all rah-rah bullshit, I’d like to share my early results in order to encourage any of you that are on the fence. Last year my birthday was spent at a Chinese Buffet with a toddler having a melt-down. I said I didn’t care what we did for my birthday (I did) and however we spent it would be fine (it wasn’t). I ended up being crazy mad at my husband which was met with bewilderment, “you said it didn’t matter”. The Chinese Buffet showdown  of 2015 wasn’t fair to him and it was just ridiculous on my part. This year I was direct, explicit and very encouraging: I’d like to go on a trip with nice restaurants, galleries and, no, I don’t want the kids along. Nailed it. See exhibit A above(my birthday present) and B below, as pictured.

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Life isn’t all wine on a Saturday afternoon dining al fresco, so in my day to day hum drum life I’ve been practicing this, too. I have been setting up one on one meetings, some easy, some hard to speak my truth. On that note, speak  your truth and then shut-up and listen. We connect so little face to face with people these days that sometimes when you speak your truth and listen, you might cry, you might soften a little. In my book, that’s a lovely thing. You have little time for posturing when you are sitting face to face with someone, if your intent is honest and true, there is so much less of that. An e-mail is quick, where a real conversation takes time, but is a true foundation you can build upon. So far I haven’t regretted one moment of the time I have spent doing this, time well spent.

Speak your truth, kindly. You can say the same thing any number of ways. Be charitable until you know you’re being played. Then continue to speak your truth in a way that you can look yourself in the mirror and know that you have done everything you possibly can. Sleep well with that truth then, even if the change you wish doesn’t occur.

Speak your truth, but know it’s only your truth in this moment. You may change, too. I have.

Keep sharing moxie!